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Like Night and Day 46
Chapter 46
Night of Wonders || (a song for feelings)
The most dangerous thing an individual can ever do is to stop caring. It can render them numb and callous to anything and everything around them. But to Baekhyun, it was the only defense mechanism he had and the only thing he knew would keep the pain away.
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Baekhyun didn’t know if the feeling he had in his chest was due to the fact that he was standing in front of his mirror fixing a bow tie, preparing for an event that meant nothing to him or that he was doing it so ghostly passive because, in the back of his mind, he knew Chanyeol wouldn’t be the one he’d be opening his front door to. Prom night was as bleak as he imagined, but there was a dryness in his throat that he couldn’t quench. His cell phone remained silent the entire time he was preparing, and with a sad thought, Baekhyun knew that if things were slightly different in the universe, the small device would ring every so often, notifying him of text messages sent by his eager boyfriend…
Boyfriend… Baekhyun locked his jaw. He had avoided thinking of the word--him--for the last week and a half, even making sure they rarely ever crossed paths. And when they did… he began to notice how it was always his eyes looking at the giant, never the other way around. For the first time since they met, it was him who was staring.
Adjusting the bow tie around his neck, Baekhyun frowned at his reflection before looking away. He felt disgusted and burdened by his own image, but it was something that he was quick to push back in an attempt to forget and bury it somewhere within his mind. After finishing to what he found was satisfactory, Baekhyun moved aside and walked toward his bedside table, picking up the two prom tickets and his phone.
The LCD screen showed him nothing except a single message from his prom date. No texts from Chanyeol and no calls. It had been that way since that night, and yet, Baekhyun couldn’t fathom why in the world his heart felt like it always hoped that the giant’s name would somehow appear…
It was undeniable that he missed him… There were shadows underneath his eyes, proof of the fact that sleep was a rare occasion. Although during the day it was easy and effortless to forget the boy he loved, it was always during the night when the longing would sometimes get too unbearable, resulting in the brunet walking out of his house in the dark for a quick walk.
[ Jihoon ]
I’m coming by to pick you up in fifteen minutes.
Simple and curt. If Chanyeol had been his date, for sure there would’ve been more to the message than just some type of notification. It would’ve been more sweeter, perhaps with a touch of the giant’s clumsy humor within the message and--
Shaking his head, Baekhyun put the phone away in his front pocket, looked at himself one more time before heading downstairs to sit on the porch, waiting for his prom date to arrive.
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He wasn’t one to romanticize prom entirely, but there was something about it that was special. Ideally, that is, prom was supposed to be memorable in the right way.
That night was supposed to make him feel happy, but he felt weighed down. Smiling was also supposed to be effortless, but that was more of a struggle than he originally thought it’d be.
The cameras flashing in front of his eyes were beginning to hurt his eyes, but his parents, as well as Nana’s, wanted an entire photo album of the two before they left.
“One more picture, Chanyeol. We promise!”
The coddling tones never seemed to end with the false promises of just one more, but with his head high and arms wrapped around Nana’s waist, Chanyeol grinned, showing the cameras what they asked for.
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Baekhyun wanted a no-hassle prom experience and that was what he got. No pictures, no intimate moment with the exchange of flowers to pin on each other’s suit… Nothing. He felt as if everything that was part of the dull tradition of prom was stripped away from his only experience. That was exactly what he wanted in the first place, but as he sat in the car, listening to Jihoon hum along to a tune from a familiar band that he knew, Baekhyun felt incomplete.
Maybe it was a mistake to get in the car. Perhaps he shouldn't have even gotten ready or dressed. If he could turn time back and relive the past, Baekhyun felt as if he shouldn’t have allowed himself to accept Jihoon’s proposal and opted to stay at home.
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As the car pulled up to the venue, Jihoon rolled his window to talk to a worker in charge of parking organization. Tuning out the conversation, Baekhyun turned to the right, nose almost touching the cold window glass when he spotted his giant in arms with another girl.
That must’ve been his ex-girlfriend, Nana--as Kyungsoo told him.
“Nana is, I assume, number four. She’s the most recent ex of his--besides you, I mean.”
“We haven’t broken up.”
“You forgot one word there, Baekhyun. You forgot to say ‘yet’... Don’t go silent on me. We always knew where love would eventually lead to. It’s only ever a matter of time.”
After hearing his name being called numerous time, Baekhyun finally snapped out of it and turned his head back in Jihoon’s direction. His date, puzzled, yet sympathetic, gave him a small, even smile. “Are you ready to make those precious high school memories everybody talks about?”
The brunet’s throat was dry and he felt no energy in his entire body to move. He wanted to sit in the vehicle in silence, engulfed in the dark, but Jihoon’s offered hand was dripping guilt into his conscience. When a few seconds had passed and Baekhyun finally made up his mind, he nodded, gently giving the older male his hand.
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Kyungsoo stood at the balcony of the upper level, watching as more and more eager teenagers entered the venue, greeting friends and excitedly taking their cell phones out to record their precious moments of youth. He rolled his eyes in dull contempt before turning around and mindlessly watched as individuals made their way up to the snack area.
What had taken such time and effort to plan and organize turned out to be so lackluster. It was, however, expected. The budget that had been set aside by the school as well as the extra funds from the fundraiser earlier that year wasn’t extraordinary or extravagant. Despite all the positive comments about the decoration and food he was hearing as he passed people by, Kyungsoo thought nothing more of it than blissful ignorance of what quality actually was.
He walked to the area for drinks, intent on getting a cup of water to relieve himself from the ugly stuffiness of the place. There was little attention paid to the gentleman standing near by until Kyungsoo heard his name being said in the midst of pouring his cup full.
“I didn’t expect you to actually come to an event like this. You’re the last person I expected to waste their time at this type of school event on a Saturday night.”
Raising an amused brow, Kyungsoo took a sip first before turning his eyes over at the tall soccer captain dressed in a fittingly nice suit. “Don’t you think it’s only fitting for the student body president to oversee an event like this?”
Scoffing, Jongin glanced around. “There’s not much to oversee. You should take off your little president hat for once and enjoy something as a teenager. I mean, if you know what it actually means to be a teenager.”
“Don’t bother with yourself,” Kyungsoo said, quick to reply. “We’re all practically young adults. Some of us are already eighteen; others are on the brink. Shouldn’t it be time to stop dancing around like the rest of these morons and start waking up to reality?”
Jongin played as if he was contemplating the words said by the shorter male, but ultimately shrugged, crushing the paper water cup in his hand before tossing it in a nearby trash bin. “No. I don’t think so.”
“Of course you don’t--”
“It’s not time to stop dancing until you’ve danced with me, Kyungsoo.”
Frozen, Kyungsoo gaped at him. “What?”
Jongin, unfazed by the latter’s ever growing frown, cocked his head in the direction of the dance floor. “As your prom date, I suggest we put our differences aside for one night and go downstairs to dance.”
It took a moment for Kyungsoo to formulate a reply. Even then, he struggled not to stutter out his words. “When I proposed that we buy our tickets together, I did not imply that you were my date.”
“Okay… But, technically, I am your date regardless of whether or not you were just using me to bypass the school’s ticket policy that you have to have a date in order to attend.”
“Kim Jongin, I will not--”
To stop the latter’s further loop of repeating arguments, Jongin gently grabbed Kyungsoo’s hand, and like a prey frightened by its predator, he froze.
With the soccer captain so close that he could smell the pleasant smell of his cologne, Kyungsoo struggled to pry himself away. On a usual day, it wouldn’t have been so difficult, but there were people around, watching them, and Jongin knew how precious image was to him. If he made a scene, it would’ve caused more than a few heads to turn and more than handful of whispers to emerge. Hoping to avoid the hassle of it all, Kyungsoo pressed the heel of his shoe down on the tip of Jongin’s and waited until the latter jerked away, glaring.
“I hope you enjoy the rest of your night. Really,” Kyungsoo said sweetly, smiled stretched across his face. Both of them, however, knew better than those around them. “I just hope I don’t have to see you again so that I can enjoy mine.”
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It was far too late into the night to start realizing how agonizingly wrong he was, but that was exactly what was stirring in his head the moment he accidentally found himself standing right in front of his boyfriend. His throat felt dry and Baekhyun had the feeling of instant dissociation from the rest of the world. To him, it was as if it was only the two of them despite his own date and the beautiful girl with her hand holding Chanyeol’s arm.
What felt like forever passed in a matter of seconds. Physically tugged on by Jihoon, Baekhyun moved a step back until his back felt the chest of the older male. The contact between the two didn’t sit so well with the giant who said nothing, but his eyes said it all.
Baekhyun bit the bottom of his lip before realizing what he was doing and stopped. Then, to the best of his ability, he attempted to speak without sounding so dry and quiet.
“Hey.” It was the first word spoken between them in a week and it was the oddest feeling in the world. “How are you?”
The smile on Chanyeol’s face was polite and hard to read, but Baekhyun knew better. “I’m great! You?”
The tone of his voice almost made Baekhyun scoff, but he held it in. Nodding, he shrugged instead. “I’m doing fine myself.”
“That’s good…” Baekhyun’s voice trailed off and before he knew it, he felt the awkward tension begin to arise. To avoid the seething pressure, he turned his eyes to the girl, Nana, and said, “I like your dress. It’s lovely on you.”
Smiling, Nana bowed her head to cover her face before raising it back up to give the brunet a clean-cut smile. “Thank you, Baekhyun. You look very handsome tonight, too. You’re the last person I thought I’d ever see in a formal suit like that.”
“Yeah, well, you’re not the only one.”
Nana laughed, and Baekhyun tried his best to keep the facade though his eyes continued glancing at her hand on the giant’s arm. “Oh, but where’s your boutonniere?”
Confused, Baekhyun drew his brows together. “What?” he asked. In the corner of his eye, he saw Chanyeol watching him with his smile gone.
“The flower boys get? The ones that get pinned onto their jacket?” Moving slightly away from Chanyeol, Nana gestured to a beautiful little arrangement of small flowers articulated into a simple design stuck into Chanyeol’s black suit. As she talked, explaining the meaning of the tradition, which Baekhyun found utterly boring and unnecessary, the brunet’s eyes watched as her hand grazed against Chanyeol’s chest. And if he had known any better, he would’ve been aware of the jealousy he felt inside.
After she finished speaking, Baekhyun turned his head to Jihoon who looked back at him. “I didn’t get one, but that’s okay. I didn’t want one of those anyways.”
“You should’ve gotten one.” The giant’s deep voice was a surprise to hear. Baekhyun looked at him, meeting the boy’s eyes almost immediately. “I think it would’ve looked nice pinned on you.”
“I—” Before Baekhyun could even begin to have the opportunity to speak, Jihoon pulled him close to him with a hand on the brunet’s waist.
“Princess, here, told me not to get him anything, so I figured I shouldn’t waste my money then.” Jihoon smiled over at Nana, oblivious to the way Chanyeol almost seemed visibly offended. “I mean, what was I supposed to do? Argue with him until he said yes?”
Nana raised an amused brow. “I don’t know about arguing, but--”
“Actually, with Baekhyun, you do have to argue just to get him to consider what you’re even asking,” Chanyeol cut in, his voice unsure of itself. It was in conflict between attempting to sound calm and sounding with apparent anger. “But he’s your date, so I can’t really tell you what I’d do any differently--”
Sensing the underlying emotions running high on bottled up issues, Nana took a hold of Chanyeol by the arm and gripped him with slight force, cutting the boy off mid-sentence. Looking a bit apologetic in Baekhyun and Jihoon’s direction, she forced a small smile, gracious yet in control.
“Well, we hope that you guys have fun!” As she tugged, Nana suggested, “We should check out the photobooth! Do you want to go?”
Baekhyun could tell from the boy’s body language and the way the corner of his smile faltered for a split second that he wanted to stay longer, maybe even take him away. It was arguable that a week was barely any time apart, but within their circumstances, it was a suffocating experience and Baekhyun was drowning at his own will.
Knowing that he had to pull away first in order for the giant to be coerced by his beautiful date, Baekhyun held his breath for a moment in time before reaching for Jihoon’s hand. “Enjoy your prom,” he said as he began to steer the other man away.
Though dark and dimly lit, the brunet could still see with every detail the look given in his direction by his boyfriend. At that point however, it no longer felt as if they were in a relationship. It seemed like the awkward post-stage of a terrible breakup. The only thing keeping them together was…
Baekhyun didn’t know. As he let go of Jihoon’s hand, he took a seat in a secluded area where a few resting couples sat and buried his face in his hands, uncaring of how he might’ve appeared to the others.
Their relationship was crumbling, slipping through his fingers, but it was his fault. He didn’t want to think that it was, but for the most part, he had the blame on his shoulders. It was all deserved in the way that he saw it. It was for the best.
He kept repeating it like a mantra, over and over again, hoping to convince himself even more that what he was doing was right.
Chanyeol looked like he was doing well… Maybe he had shown signs of jealousy or slight aggravation, but in the end, he seemed as if he was the one faring better between the two of them. Aside from that, he and Nana looked like something to be envied, which, for what was left of him, made Baekhyun want to push away even more.
What was keeping them together? Those brief promises of forever or was it the short, but truthful confessions of love? The physical compatibility? No. That couldn’t have been it. Sex was too shallow of a reason to even consider.
Ignoring the hand that was placed on his shoulder, Baekhyun raised his face, just enough for his eyes to look onto the dance floor and witness his boyfriend slow dancing, swaying with his ex with a smile on his face. He looked so good, so stable… unlike himself, who was sitting in a dark corner, a mess.
Just like the song, Baekhyun’s reality suddenly began to slow as he came upon the realization as to what kept their relationship together tethered by a single strand.
It was Chanyeol’s hope of what could be.
Hope was what kept them together. Though distance and time was always being put between them, Chanyeol’s positive outlook kept them magnetic. Every time Baekhyun chose to fight, the giant would fight as well. However, they always fought for different reasons. Baekhyun chose to fight against, whereas Chanyeol chose to fight for... He was always reaching forward in times when Baekhyun would push himself back in the hopes that the brunet would reach for him, too…
This time felt different. It felt as if nothing mattered anymore. Whether he left the country tomorrow or simply disappeared, it felt like the ripples he’d make would be nothing compared to the waves of the sea.
Just as the song began to near its end, Baekhyun finally reached the decision to put an end of their never-ending tug of war. The sight of his giant, so gentle and kind, dancing with, perhaps, the girl more fitting for him, began to soak inside his heart like a bitter poison… And by the time Nana stood on the tip of her toes to give the athlete a soft kiss on the lips, Baekhyun found himself in the dark, no longer caring.
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“Can I ask you something Kyungsoo?”
“What?”
“How did it feel?”
“What the hell are you talking about, Park?”
“I mean… How did it feel when you saw Baekhyun with me? How did it feel seeing somebody that you loved with another person?”
“Do you want me to sugarcoat it for you or do you want a straight answer?”
“I’d prefer for you to just tell me…”
“It felt like someone shot me in the chest...a thousand times until I felt like I was dead.”
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After apologizing to Jihoon, Baekhyun asked to be alone. The older male complied without arguing and promptly left to entertain himself on the upper level of the venue, leaving the brunet with little concern.
It took thirty minutes outside the venue, staring into the dark abyss of space, for Baekhyun to reach the decision to leave the dance without his date, without anyone.
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Chanyeol stood aside with his hands in his pockets as he watched Nana wait for their photobooth pictures to develop and slide out from the side. Every once in awhile, his eyes would shoot up in the hopes that he’d catch a glimpse of the brunet somewhere in the crowd, even if it meant having to see him dance with that guy, but no matter how hard he tried, he could never find him. In fact, the last time that he actually saw the brunet was when they last spoke towards the earlier part of the evening.
He heard the short buzzing of the machine before Nana bent over and picked up the photos. They were goofy and memorable, but it was nothing like Chanyeol had imagined.
“We look cute, don’t you think?” Nana asked.
Her question was heard, but barely. The music was loud, but in his honest opinion, Chanyeol didn’t care as much to please her anymore when his entire focus and purpose was set on Baekhyun.
“Chanyeol?”
Spotting Kyungsoo walking near him, Chanyeol decided to be selfish for once that night. He had let Baekhyun be free with a man he didn’t like, let himself be kissed by his ex-girlfriend before firmly putting her down, and gave the entire night a chance before deciding it wasn’t worth it. He wanted to be selfish; he wanted to know where his stubborn boyfriend was.
“Kyungsoo!” Chanyeol called, raising his hand in an effort to be seen by the male who immediately darted him the same look he always gave. Shortly after nearing him, the giant wasted no time in asking, “Have you seen, Baekhyun?”
Snorting, Kyungsoo rolled his eyes. He paused for a moment, looking back behind Chanyeol to lock eyes with Nana before he answered. “I feel like I keep better track of your boyfriend than you do, Park.”
“I’m just asking--”
“Well, his date’s upstairs. Talking to a few girls, which I don’t really care for but--”
Shaking his head, Chanyeol pursed his lips. “I don’t care about him.” He did, but not at that moment. “What about Baekhyun? Is he alone somewhere?”
Shrugging, Kyungsoo eyed the dance floor. “I really don’t know, Park. For all I know, he could’ve gone home already.”
Nana touched Chanyeol by the arm. “Maybe he found some friends to dance with? You never know. He might’ve found one of his weird friends and--”
She caught her slip too late as Chanyeol pulled himself away from her grasp. He opened his mouth, but found no words slipping out. Knowing he’d rather not waste a breath on her, he turned his attention back to the student body president. “So he’s not here anymore?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“He’s not with Jihoon and he’s not the type to be at a thing like this by himself...” Chanyeol stopped for a second to look around as if to confirm his gut feeling. “He went home… Baekhyun went home.”
Just before he made a move to leave, Kyungsoo shot out a hand and grabbed him by the wrist. “Whether you know it or not, tonight changed everything… Keep that in mind and just let him be, Chanyeol, even if it means having to let him go.”
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a/n: After 10,000 years, I updated. Now, imma go back into hibernation until summer! hahahah Anyways, hope you enjoyed. Sorry for any mistakes. I'm a butthole.
OOO also, guys! Check out my speedpainting video of NI!Baekhyun and Nugget : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdMltCeKi2I
Please like and subscribe if you want. That would be cool :)
Sorry for being away for so long, but hopefully this wasn't too baaaad. Thank you! Excited for the next chapter because y'know ^^
See yall next timeee
Night of Wonders || (a song for feelings)
The most dangerous thing an individual can ever do is to stop caring. It can render them numb and callous to anything and everything around them. But to Baekhyun, it was the only defense mechanism he had and the only thing he knew would keep the pain away.
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Baekhyun didn’t know if the feeling he had in his chest was due to the fact that he was standing in front of his mirror fixing a bow tie, preparing for an event that meant nothing to him or that he was doing it so ghostly passive because, in the back of his mind, he knew Chanyeol wouldn’t be the one he’d be opening his front door to. Prom night was as bleak as he imagined, but there was a dryness in his throat that he couldn’t quench. His cell phone remained silent the entire time he was preparing, and with a sad thought, Baekhyun knew that if things were slightly different in the universe, the small device would ring every so often, notifying him of text messages sent by his eager boyfriend…
Boyfriend… Baekhyun locked his jaw. He had avoided thinking of the word--him--for the last week and a half, even making sure they rarely ever crossed paths. And when they did… he began to notice how it was always his eyes looking at the giant, never the other way around. For the first time since they met, it was him who was staring.
Adjusting the bow tie around his neck, Baekhyun frowned at his reflection before looking away. He felt disgusted and burdened by his own image, but it was something that he was quick to push back in an attempt to forget and bury it somewhere within his mind. After finishing to what he found was satisfactory, Baekhyun moved aside and walked toward his bedside table, picking up the two prom tickets and his phone.
The LCD screen showed him nothing except a single message from his prom date. No texts from Chanyeol and no calls. It had been that way since that night, and yet, Baekhyun couldn’t fathom why in the world his heart felt like it always hoped that the giant’s name would somehow appear…
It was undeniable that he missed him… There were shadows underneath his eyes, proof of the fact that sleep was a rare occasion. Although during the day it was easy and effortless to forget the boy he loved, it was always during the night when the longing would sometimes get too unbearable, resulting in the brunet walking out of his house in the dark for a quick walk.
[ Jihoon ]
I’m coming by to pick you up in fifteen minutes.
Simple and curt. If Chanyeol had been his date, for sure there would’ve been more to the message than just some type of notification. It would’ve been more sweeter, perhaps with a touch of the giant’s clumsy humor within the message and--
Shaking his head, Baekhyun put the phone away in his front pocket, looked at himself one more time before heading downstairs to sit on the porch, waiting for his prom date to arrive.
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He wasn’t one to romanticize prom entirely, but there was something about it that was special. Ideally, that is, prom was supposed to be memorable in the right way.
That night was supposed to make him feel happy, but he felt weighed down. Smiling was also supposed to be effortless, but that was more of a struggle than he originally thought it’d be.
The cameras flashing in front of his eyes were beginning to hurt his eyes, but his parents, as well as Nana’s, wanted an entire photo album of the two before they left.
“One more picture, Chanyeol. We promise!”
The coddling tones never seemed to end with the false promises of just one more, but with his head high and arms wrapped around Nana’s waist, Chanyeol grinned, showing the cameras what they asked for.
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Baekhyun wanted a no-hassle prom experience and that was what he got. No pictures, no intimate moment with the exchange of flowers to pin on each other’s suit… Nothing. He felt as if everything that was part of the dull tradition of prom was stripped away from his only experience. That was exactly what he wanted in the first place, but as he sat in the car, listening to Jihoon hum along to a tune from a familiar band that he knew, Baekhyun felt incomplete.
Maybe it was a mistake to get in the car. Perhaps he shouldn't have even gotten ready or dressed. If he could turn time back and relive the past, Baekhyun felt as if he shouldn’t have allowed himself to accept Jihoon’s proposal and opted to stay at home.
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As the car pulled up to the venue, Jihoon rolled his window to talk to a worker in charge of parking organization. Tuning out the conversation, Baekhyun turned to the right, nose almost touching the cold window glass when he spotted his giant in arms with another girl.
That must’ve been his ex-girlfriend, Nana--as Kyungsoo told him.
“Nana is, I assume, number four. She’s the most recent ex of his--besides you, I mean.”
“We haven’t broken up.”
“You forgot one word there, Baekhyun. You forgot to say ‘yet’... Don’t go silent on me. We always knew where love would eventually lead to. It’s only ever a matter of time.”
After hearing his name being called numerous time, Baekhyun finally snapped out of it and turned his head back in Jihoon’s direction. His date, puzzled, yet sympathetic, gave him a small, even smile. “Are you ready to make those precious high school memories everybody talks about?”
The brunet’s throat was dry and he felt no energy in his entire body to move. He wanted to sit in the vehicle in silence, engulfed in the dark, but Jihoon’s offered hand was dripping guilt into his conscience. When a few seconds had passed and Baekhyun finally made up his mind, he nodded, gently giving the older male his hand.
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Kyungsoo stood at the balcony of the upper level, watching as more and more eager teenagers entered the venue, greeting friends and excitedly taking their cell phones out to record their precious moments of youth. He rolled his eyes in dull contempt before turning around and mindlessly watched as individuals made their way up to the snack area.
What had taken such time and effort to plan and organize turned out to be so lackluster. It was, however, expected. The budget that had been set aside by the school as well as the extra funds from the fundraiser earlier that year wasn’t extraordinary or extravagant. Despite all the positive comments about the decoration and food he was hearing as he passed people by, Kyungsoo thought nothing more of it than blissful ignorance of what quality actually was.
He walked to the area for drinks, intent on getting a cup of water to relieve himself from the ugly stuffiness of the place. There was little attention paid to the gentleman standing near by until Kyungsoo heard his name being said in the midst of pouring his cup full.
“I didn’t expect you to actually come to an event like this. You’re the last person I expected to waste their time at this type of school event on a Saturday night.”
Raising an amused brow, Kyungsoo took a sip first before turning his eyes over at the tall soccer captain dressed in a fittingly nice suit. “Don’t you think it’s only fitting for the student body president to oversee an event like this?”
Scoffing, Jongin glanced around. “There’s not much to oversee. You should take off your little president hat for once and enjoy something as a teenager. I mean, if you know what it actually means to be a teenager.”
“Don’t bother with yourself,” Kyungsoo said, quick to reply. “We’re all practically young adults. Some of us are already eighteen; others are on the brink. Shouldn’t it be time to stop dancing around like the rest of these morons and start waking up to reality?”
Jongin played as if he was contemplating the words said by the shorter male, but ultimately shrugged, crushing the paper water cup in his hand before tossing it in a nearby trash bin. “No. I don’t think so.”
“Of course you don’t--”
“It’s not time to stop dancing until you’ve danced with me, Kyungsoo.”
Frozen, Kyungsoo gaped at him. “What?”
Jongin, unfazed by the latter’s ever growing frown, cocked his head in the direction of the dance floor. “As your prom date, I suggest we put our differences aside for one night and go downstairs to dance.”
It took a moment for Kyungsoo to formulate a reply. Even then, he struggled not to stutter out his words. “When I proposed that we buy our tickets together, I did not imply that you were my date.”
“Okay… But, technically, I am your date regardless of whether or not you were just using me to bypass the school’s ticket policy that you have to have a date in order to attend.”
“Kim Jongin, I will not--”
To stop the latter’s further loop of repeating arguments, Jongin gently grabbed Kyungsoo’s hand, and like a prey frightened by its predator, he froze.
With the soccer captain so close that he could smell the pleasant smell of his cologne, Kyungsoo struggled to pry himself away. On a usual day, it wouldn’t have been so difficult, but there were people around, watching them, and Jongin knew how precious image was to him. If he made a scene, it would’ve caused more than a few heads to turn and more than handful of whispers to emerge. Hoping to avoid the hassle of it all, Kyungsoo pressed the heel of his shoe down on the tip of Jongin’s and waited until the latter jerked away, glaring.
“I hope you enjoy the rest of your night. Really,” Kyungsoo said sweetly, smiled stretched across his face. Both of them, however, knew better than those around them. “I just hope I don’t have to see you again so that I can enjoy mine.”
-
-
It was far too late into the night to start realizing how agonizingly wrong he was, but that was exactly what was stirring in his head the moment he accidentally found himself standing right in front of his boyfriend. His throat felt dry and Baekhyun had the feeling of instant dissociation from the rest of the world. To him, it was as if it was only the two of them despite his own date and the beautiful girl with her hand holding Chanyeol’s arm.
What felt like forever passed in a matter of seconds. Physically tugged on by Jihoon, Baekhyun moved a step back until his back felt the chest of the older male. The contact between the two didn’t sit so well with the giant who said nothing, but his eyes said it all.
Baekhyun bit the bottom of his lip before realizing what he was doing and stopped. Then, to the best of his ability, he attempted to speak without sounding so dry and quiet.
“Hey.” It was the first word spoken between them in a week and it was the oddest feeling in the world. “How are you?”
The smile on Chanyeol’s face was polite and hard to read, but Baekhyun knew better. “I’m great! You?”
The tone of his voice almost made Baekhyun scoff, but he held it in. Nodding, he shrugged instead. “I’m doing fine myself.”
“That’s good…” Baekhyun’s voice trailed off and before he knew it, he felt the awkward tension begin to arise. To avoid the seething pressure, he turned his eyes to the girl, Nana, and said, “I like your dress. It’s lovely on you.”
Smiling, Nana bowed her head to cover her face before raising it back up to give the brunet a clean-cut smile. “Thank you, Baekhyun. You look very handsome tonight, too. You’re the last person I thought I’d ever see in a formal suit like that.”
“Yeah, well, you’re not the only one.”
Nana laughed, and Baekhyun tried his best to keep the facade though his eyes continued glancing at her hand on the giant’s arm. “Oh, but where’s your boutonniere?”
Confused, Baekhyun drew his brows together. “What?” he asked. In the corner of his eye, he saw Chanyeol watching him with his smile gone.
“The flower boys get? The ones that get pinned onto their jacket?” Moving slightly away from Chanyeol, Nana gestured to a beautiful little arrangement of small flowers articulated into a simple design stuck into Chanyeol’s black suit. As she talked, explaining the meaning of the tradition, which Baekhyun found utterly boring and unnecessary, the brunet’s eyes watched as her hand grazed against Chanyeol’s chest. And if he had known any better, he would’ve been aware of the jealousy he felt inside.
After she finished speaking, Baekhyun turned his head to Jihoon who looked back at him. “I didn’t get one, but that’s okay. I didn’t want one of those anyways.”
“You should’ve gotten one.” The giant’s deep voice was a surprise to hear. Baekhyun looked at him, meeting the boy’s eyes almost immediately. “I think it would’ve looked nice pinned on you.”
“I—” Before Baekhyun could even begin to have the opportunity to speak, Jihoon pulled him close to him with a hand on the brunet’s waist.
“Princess, here, told me not to get him anything, so I figured I shouldn’t waste my money then.” Jihoon smiled over at Nana, oblivious to the way Chanyeol almost seemed visibly offended. “I mean, what was I supposed to do? Argue with him until he said yes?”
Nana raised an amused brow. “I don’t know about arguing, but--”
“Actually, with Baekhyun, you do have to argue just to get him to consider what you’re even asking,” Chanyeol cut in, his voice unsure of itself. It was in conflict between attempting to sound calm and sounding with apparent anger. “But he’s your date, so I can’t really tell you what I’d do any differently--”
Sensing the underlying emotions running high on bottled up issues, Nana took a hold of Chanyeol by the arm and gripped him with slight force, cutting the boy off mid-sentence. Looking a bit apologetic in Baekhyun and Jihoon’s direction, she forced a small smile, gracious yet in control.
“Well, we hope that you guys have fun!” As she tugged, Nana suggested, “We should check out the photobooth! Do you want to go?”
Baekhyun could tell from the boy’s body language and the way the corner of his smile faltered for a split second that he wanted to stay longer, maybe even take him away. It was arguable that a week was barely any time apart, but within their circumstances, it was a suffocating experience and Baekhyun was drowning at his own will.
Knowing that he had to pull away first in order for the giant to be coerced by his beautiful date, Baekhyun held his breath for a moment in time before reaching for Jihoon’s hand. “Enjoy your prom,” he said as he began to steer the other man away.
Though dark and dimly lit, the brunet could still see with every detail the look given in his direction by his boyfriend. At that point however, it no longer felt as if they were in a relationship. It seemed like the awkward post-stage of a terrible breakup. The only thing keeping them together was…
Baekhyun didn’t know. As he let go of Jihoon’s hand, he took a seat in a secluded area where a few resting couples sat and buried his face in his hands, uncaring of how he might’ve appeared to the others.
Their relationship was crumbling, slipping through his fingers, but it was his fault. He didn’t want to think that it was, but for the most part, he had the blame on his shoulders. It was all deserved in the way that he saw it. It was for the best.
He kept repeating it like a mantra, over and over again, hoping to convince himself even more that what he was doing was right.
Chanyeol looked like he was doing well… Maybe he had shown signs of jealousy or slight aggravation, but in the end, he seemed as if he was the one faring better between the two of them. Aside from that, he and Nana looked like something to be envied, which, for what was left of him, made Baekhyun want to push away even more.
What was keeping them together? Those brief promises of forever or was it the short, but truthful confessions of love? The physical compatibility? No. That couldn’t have been it. Sex was too shallow of a reason to even consider.
Ignoring the hand that was placed on his shoulder, Baekhyun raised his face, just enough for his eyes to look onto the dance floor and witness his boyfriend slow dancing, swaying with his ex with a smile on his face. He looked so good, so stable… unlike himself, who was sitting in a dark corner, a mess.
Just like the song, Baekhyun’s reality suddenly began to slow as he came upon the realization as to what kept their relationship together tethered by a single strand.
It was Chanyeol’s hope of what could be.
Hope was what kept them together. Though distance and time was always being put between them, Chanyeol’s positive outlook kept them magnetic. Every time Baekhyun chose to fight, the giant would fight as well. However, they always fought for different reasons. Baekhyun chose to fight against, whereas Chanyeol chose to fight for... He was always reaching forward in times when Baekhyun would push himself back in the hopes that the brunet would reach for him, too…
This time felt different. It felt as if nothing mattered anymore. Whether he left the country tomorrow or simply disappeared, it felt like the ripples he’d make would be nothing compared to the waves of the sea.
Just as the song began to near its end, Baekhyun finally reached the decision to put an end of their never-ending tug of war. The sight of his giant, so gentle and kind, dancing with, perhaps, the girl more fitting for him, began to soak inside his heart like a bitter poison… And by the time Nana stood on the tip of her toes to give the athlete a soft kiss on the lips, Baekhyun found himself in the dark, no longer caring.
-
-
“Can I ask you something Kyungsoo?”
“What?”
“How did it feel?”
“What the hell are you talking about, Park?”
“I mean… How did it feel when you saw Baekhyun with me? How did it feel seeing somebody that you loved with another person?”
“Do you want me to sugarcoat it for you or do you want a straight answer?”
“I’d prefer for you to just tell me…”
“It felt like someone shot me in the chest...a thousand times until I felt like I was dead.”
-
-
After apologizing to Jihoon, Baekhyun asked to be alone. The older male complied without arguing and promptly left to entertain himself on the upper level of the venue, leaving the brunet with little concern.
It took thirty minutes outside the venue, staring into the dark abyss of space, for Baekhyun to reach the decision to leave the dance without his date, without anyone.
-
-
Chanyeol stood aside with his hands in his pockets as he watched Nana wait for their photobooth pictures to develop and slide out from the side. Every once in awhile, his eyes would shoot up in the hopes that he’d catch a glimpse of the brunet somewhere in the crowd, even if it meant having to see him dance with that guy, but no matter how hard he tried, he could never find him. In fact, the last time that he actually saw the brunet was when they last spoke towards the earlier part of the evening.
He heard the short buzzing of the machine before Nana bent over and picked up the photos. They were goofy and memorable, but it was nothing like Chanyeol had imagined.
“We look cute, don’t you think?” Nana asked.
Her question was heard, but barely. The music was loud, but in his honest opinion, Chanyeol didn’t care as much to please her anymore when his entire focus and purpose was set on Baekhyun.
“Chanyeol?”
Spotting Kyungsoo walking near him, Chanyeol decided to be selfish for once that night. He had let Baekhyun be free with a man he didn’t like, let himself be kissed by his ex-girlfriend before firmly putting her down, and gave the entire night a chance before deciding it wasn’t worth it. He wanted to be selfish; he wanted to know where his stubborn boyfriend was.
“Kyungsoo!” Chanyeol called, raising his hand in an effort to be seen by the male who immediately darted him the same look he always gave. Shortly after nearing him, the giant wasted no time in asking, “Have you seen, Baekhyun?”
Snorting, Kyungsoo rolled his eyes. He paused for a moment, looking back behind Chanyeol to lock eyes with Nana before he answered. “I feel like I keep better track of your boyfriend than you do, Park.”
“I’m just asking--”
“Well, his date’s upstairs. Talking to a few girls, which I don’t really care for but--”
Shaking his head, Chanyeol pursed his lips. “I don’t care about him.” He did, but not at that moment. “What about Baekhyun? Is he alone somewhere?”
Shrugging, Kyungsoo eyed the dance floor. “I really don’t know, Park. For all I know, he could’ve gone home already.”
Nana touched Chanyeol by the arm. “Maybe he found some friends to dance with? You never know. He might’ve found one of his weird friends and--”
She caught her slip too late as Chanyeol pulled himself away from her grasp. He opened his mouth, but found no words slipping out. Knowing he’d rather not waste a breath on her, he turned his attention back to the student body president. “So he’s not here anymore?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“He’s not with Jihoon and he’s not the type to be at a thing like this by himself...” Chanyeol stopped for a second to look around as if to confirm his gut feeling. “He went home… Baekhyun went home.”
Just before he made a move to leave, Kyungsoo shot out a hand and grabbed him by the wrist. “Whether you know it or not, tonight changed everything… Keep that in mind and just let him be, Chanyeol, even if it means having to let him go.”
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a/n: After 10,000 years, I updated. Now, imma go back into hibernation until summer! hahahah Anyways, hope you enjoyed. Sorry for any mistakes. I'm a butthole.
OOO also, guys! Check out my speedpainting video of NI!Baekhyun and Nugget : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdMltCeKi2I
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Sorry for being away for so long, but hopefully this wasn't too baaaad. Thank you! Excited for the next chapter because y'know ^^
See yall next timeee